twentysomething

I didn't think that twenty will gonna be this complicated Now I can't pass a day without thinking and worrying about future Brother and father tell me about their probs and listen to my advises That's pretty weird actually, since I am the only and youngest girl in family How can they listen and trust to the advises of this lil girl? Boyfie and I start talking about our future life Wait. our? Yeah. let's say it ((our)) 'cause I think (and hope) this is gonna be the right moment and person Lecturers start talking about thesis What? I think it was just yesterday since the time people called me freshman And I, start thinking and planning about all of those stuffs How to be a good mother? How to make family happy and proud of having me? What kind of job that suits me? What to do after college? What's the title of my thesis? rrrrr.....

Being in love right after a heart break is usually happened in novels or dramas. Or people will call it 'escaping'. I thought the same, peeps. But glad it is not. Now I believe in 'rainbow comes after the storm'. Yeah, I'm talking about the fifth paragraph in my previous post. He was taking me a motorcycle ride when I decided to tell him about 'the news'. He answered just like him. Yelling and stuffs. But I was silent, and he understood. From that moment I told him everything I felt. From that moment, my black book was not the only one who knew my feelings.  And that moment comes. I thought he were irritated to my annoying face and self thought so that finally he said "how about facing the real life?" and voila. I knew the girl and I was okay.  Time goes by, he confessed to me and a boring yet sweet story comes after it. Everything was okay until we realized that we were in a such difficult situation. We were 'working' in an or...

It's been precisely a year ago since the time I declared that I moved on. Moved on from everything that make me un-describe-able for about a month. And the most important thing is, I moved on from (let's say) secretly liking and admiring you since being freshman 'till the second year.  I-feel-blessed-from that moment until now (and forever. aamiin) Re-reading my writings is not my thing actually. But that black book was interesting. I can not describe myself a year ago. I ... tried to be a positive girl, I couldn't say bad things about you in front of people even in front of mirror. I thought you were perfect so that I couldn't mention even one bad thing about you -my bad. silly girl-  Until I find you had a crush on a girl. You looked so happy as if you find your missing piece. And yeah, silly me. I just couldn't help to face that -heart breaking- moment. Idk if you have known it or not, I refused to know who -she- is for about two weeks. I closed ...